Don't you love awkward moments? Don't you love awkward moments even more when you don't realize it's an awkward moment til it gets even more awkward? Don't you love the way awkward is spelled? (Can you tell I love the word awkward? Yeah? Ok, just making sure)
Well, I hate to admit it, but I am a pro at awkward moments. Not the cool pro that breezes over it, smoothes it over, makes it fun, and moves on. No no no, I'm definitely not that kind of pro. I'm more the pro at being completely ignorant of an awkward moment, and only when I analyze the moment later do I realize what it was and smack myself in the head and grunt. Yeah, I'm that pro.
Well recently, I went with my friend to McDonalds to eat, completely forgetting how much she said she hated the specific McD's that I chose. In my defense I chose it because of its closeness to our proximity. She is the type of person that will drive fifteen minutes out of her way to go to a different place for its better service, and I'm the lazy bloke that just chooses by ease of use and time efficiency. In this place, I'm a dying breed, also known as lower class. But I digress.
The kids were playing together in the McD's (not in a playplace, mind you, for the powers that be have decided that no McD's in our location should have playplaces anymore, lest the children want to run around and burn off the fryer grease and fat, heaven forbid!!), being loud and obnoxious as kids are want to do. I was not minding it, because they were getting along and for the most part behaving. I did not notice that my compadre was starting to clam up and become annoyed. I continued to chat with her, and make small talk, noticing that she was quieter than usual, but not thinking anything of it. Perhaps I shrugged it off as hunger, since the men in my life certainly get cranky when they are hungry. I may have thought her tight lipped expression was because the kids were being loud, and she continually had to shush them and make them sit down. When I made a joke about the McD's toys and her snappy one word answer was all I received, I started to get clued in that something was not right. When she had to go get ketchup because her daughter refused to eat her fries without it and had to wait in line for ten minutes, and came storming back to her table, I began to understand that maybe this was not a good idea having lunch here. Yes, I know, I'm slow.
She didn't say anything to me for the rest of the time, and I began to feel that itch of uncomfortableness sitting on my shoulders, like a metaphorical parrot saying the same thing over and over again "awwwwkwwwward." It became really apparent when her son asked if G and I could go over to her house afterwards, and she told him they had to go to the store, instead of an answer. She became even more stiff when he kept persisting that we go over after the store, and she didn't answer. It was all I needed to understand that our time of hanging out together was done. I told him sorry that we too had things to do, and we all left after saying our goodbyes.
I know, I know, that's not such a bad awkward experience, but its one of the most recent ones. Trust me, they are abundant in my life. Thankfully, despite my awkwardness in social settings, and my inability to respond in a smooth manner to things life throws at me, I still am able to plunder on and make friends. Those that know me, don't mind this part of me. In fact, they seem to like me even more, and that makes me less awkward. I believe those that surround me somehow make me a better version of myself, and I appreciate them all for it.
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